Trust Me

Trust. The cornerstone of any great relationship

Trust me. I have never been a big fan of lentils. To me they were always just something I was supposed to like because they are good for me.

Okay, I will eat these ribs but only because you say these are good for me!

One my friend Diana Boven who lives in Charlottesville came to Richmond for a visit. She greeted me at my front door with a gift bag. In the bag was a jar of french lentils and a recipe.

"Trust me. You'll gonna love this recipe", she said.

Diana is an excellent cook, but I there I was staring down at a jar of lentils for goodness sake. I simply smiled politely and said "Thank you. I will be sure to give these a try."

Mmmm! How yummy do these look???

After our visit was over, I put the recipe in my recipe box and the jar of lentils in cupboard.

To be honest she gave me that jar of lentils over two years ago. Each time I opened my cupboard, I would look at them and think, "I really do need to give them a try. But some other time, hmm?"

Last month, I decided it was time to start a weight loss program but felt like I needed support to get started. I visited a well respected weight loss clinic here in Richmond to see if they could help me. Though I decided not to enroll in their program, I was invited to come listen to their first lecture anyway.

Bile Beans?

The lecture talked about which foods were good for us to eat and which foods we should try to avoid. During the talk, the speaker kept talking about how great lentils were for us to eat. Packed with protein and fiber, lentils were something she recommended we make part of our lifestyle. I was not thrilled by this, but I thought maybe I should rethink trying those lentils that were taking up space in my cupboard.

Later that day while I was working out on the elliptical machine at my gym, I came across a Good Housekeeping article that featured Oprah's friend Dr. Oz's One Day Diet Recipes (April 2011). One of the recipes featured was a Warm French Lentil Salad. I figured it had to be good if Dr Oz suggested it in Good Housekeeping. After all, if you can't trust Dr. Oz and Good Housekeeping, my God who can you trust?? I mean other than me of course.

I knew a sign when I saw one.

It was time for me to try lentils. But which recipe do I try? I decided to try both recipes and both were fantastic. Trust me. Would I lie to you?

The first recipe I tried was my friend Diana Boven's recipe. Diana's recipe suggested making the salad with sausage. I decided to serve mine with salmon instead, but I will present her recipe as it was presented to me.

Warm Lentil Salad served with Salmon

Diana Boven's Warm Lentil Salad with Sausage

Serves 4

Ingredients:

2 Cups of French Green Lentils (picked over and rinsed)

6 Cups of Water

2 California Bay Leaves

1 Teaspoon Salt ( I prefer to use Sea Salt)

2 Small Onions, finely chopped (about 1 cup)

2 Carrots diced into 1/4 inch cubes (about 1 cup)

2 Celery Stalks diced into 1/4 inch cubes (about 1 cup)

1 Teaspoon of finely chopped Garlic

1/2 Teaspoon dried Thyme crumbled

1/4 Teaspoon cracked Black Pepper

1/2 Cup plus 1 Teaspoon of Extra Virgin Olive Oil

1/4 Cup of Red Wine Vinegar

1 Tablespoon of Dijon Mustard

1 Pound Smoked Kielbasa Sausage cut into 1/4 inch slices

1/4 Cup Chopped Fresh Flat Leafed Parsley

Directions:

Bring lentils, water and bay leaves to a boil in heavy saucepan, reduce heat, cover and allow to simmer about 15 minutes or until almost tender. Stir in a pinch of salt, and simmer 3 to 5 minutes longer.

While lentils simmer, saute the onions, carrots, celery, garlic, thyme, a pinch of pepper and salt in 1 tablespoon of olive oil over low heat. Cook until just the vegetables have softened or about 7 to 9 minutes.

Make the vinaigrette by whisking together the red wine vinegar, mustard and the remaining salt and pepper in a bowl. Whisk in the 1/4 cup of extra virgin olive oil in a slow stream until blended.

Drain the cooked lentils in a colander. Discard the bay leaves. Return the lentils to the saucepan. Add in the vegetables and the vinaigrette. Cook over very low heat, stirring until heated through.

If using Kielbasa, brown the slices thoroughly in a separate saute pan. Using a slotted spoon, place the cooked sausage in with the lentils. Add in the parsley and serve.

As I mentioned earlier, I chose to serve my lentils with roasted Salmon. I simply mixed the parsley into the lentils and vegetables after the vinaigrette was added. Once my salmon was plated, I surrounded the fish with the lentil salad. This has now become a favorite dish of mine. Honest.

I then decided to give Dr Oz's dish a try. Though both dishes are similar, the flavors are still different.

Dr Oz's Warm French Lentil Salad

(as shared in the April 2011 issue of Good Housekeeping)

Ingredients:

7 Ounces French Green (de Puy) Lentils (or 1 Cup) picked over and rinsed

3 Sprigs fresh Oregano plus an additional 1/4 teaspoon of chopped leaves

1 Medium Onion

3 Large Stalks of Celery

2 Large Red, Yellow or Orange Peppers

1 Tablespoon of Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Salt and Pepper

3 Tablespoons Red Wine Vinegar

1 Tablespoon of fresh Dill (plus additional for garnish)

6 Ounces of Baby Spinach

2 Ounces of Feta Cheese Crumbles (about 1/2 Cup)

Directions:

In a 4 quart saucepan, combine lentils, oregano sprigs and 3 cups of water. Bring to boil and then reduce the heat to simmer and cook for 25 to 30 minutes or until tender.

Meanwhile, chop onion, celery and peppers. Using a 12-inch saute pan, heat 1 tablespoon of olive oil over medium heat. Add in the onion and celery and saute for 7 to 8 minutes. Next add in the peppers, 2 tablespoons of water, and 1/4 teaspoon salt and black pepper. Saute for 5 minutes or until the peppers are tender but crisp.

Drain the lentils as soon as they are tender and discard the sprigs. Transfer the lentils into a bowl. Stir in the vinegar, dill, oregano, onion mixture, 1/4 teaspoon of salt and pepper and the remaining olive oil.

Divide the fresh spinach leaves among 4 serving plates. Spoon the warm lentil salad over the spinach. Top each serving with some crumbled feta and garnish with the additional fresh dill.

When I made this dish, I chose to serve it without of the spinach leaves. I also chose to use diced low fat Feta cheese instead of the Feta Cheese crumbles (I used about 1/2 block of low fat feta cheese) and mixed that directly into the bowl of lentils.

Once again I found myself loving a lentils dish. This dish is not only great served warm, it is also terrific eaten cold. Best of all, it keeps well for several days the refrigerator.

If the woman pictured was really smart she's be serving a lentil salad. Just sayin'.

So here I am. Today I can honestly say that I am a fan of lentils. Wow. I did not see that coming.

Trust me, as Tony the Tiger would say, when lentils are made into either one of these salad recipes,

"They're Grrrrrrrrreat!"

Enjoy. More yummy things to some. Stay tuned!!

Waist Not, Want Not!

What a waist!!

When I graduated from college, one of the things I missed most was the ability to be with so many other people who were like me and shared the same interests. Today through visiting internet blogs devoted to either music or photography, I once again find myself conversing with others who share my passions.

One blog that I visit regularly is http://mattadoresit.tumblr.com/. If it is true that a picture is worth a thousand words, then the blog's creator, Matt Callaway has composed a blog worth millions and millions of words.

Each day, Matt brilliantly adds just the right images to the blog in order to create a continuing narrative that flows from image to image. Here are some recent additions to to give you an idea of what he does :

I was so taken by Matt's assembly of images that I felt compelled write to him one day just to tell him how much I liked what he was doing. Since then, he and I have written back and forth several times and have developed what I like to think of as a cyber friendship.

When I started this blog, I sent Matt the link and asked him what he thought of it. Matt wrote back that he liked the blog. He was even inspired to send me one of his favorite recipes after reading my story about Berries (see http://1cor2.blogspot.com/2011/07/its-berries.html)

What Matt didn't know was that at the time he sent the recipe, I had already decided I needed to do something about my ever increasing waist line.

When I contemplated starting my diet I kept thinking about the saying: Waste Not, Want Not. The phrase is intended to mean by being thrifty, one will be less likely to be without the things they need. I use the phrase to remind myself that if I want a smaller waist, I am going to have to do without some of those sweet and delicious things that I normally want to eat. For me, it is more of a "for a big waist not, want cake not" type of interpretation.

Party time!! I also think sweet treats are worth singing about!!

Due to the fact that my belt buckle was starting to feel the strain brought on by a few too many cookies and slices of cake, I figured there was no better choice to finish off my eating binge than MattAdore's Blueberry Buckle. And I am so glad I did. It is scrumptious.

And it smells as great as it tastes!!

Matt urged me to make this recipe right away while blueberries were still at their peak. Even though the local blueberry season has now passed, these days fresh blueberries are readily available in most supermarket produce areas or frozen in the freezer section.

When I bake with blueberries, I normally prefer to use frozen blueberries as they tend not to fall apart when mixing the batter. For this recipe, I followed the directions and used fresh blueberries and they worked just great.

Are you ready to give MattAdore's Blueberry Buckle a try?

Sorry! Wrong image!!! (Just kidding).

Here's the real deal.

MattAdore's Blueberry Buckle

( you'll adore it too!!)

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees.

Mix together:

3/4 of a Cup of Sugar

1/4 Cup of Soft Shortening ( I used Butter Flavored Crisco)

1 Egg

1/2 Cup of Milk

Sift together:

2 Cups of Flour

2 Teaspoons of Baking Powder

1/2 Teaspoon Salt

Mix the sifted dry ingredients into the wet mixture. Once combined, carefully fold in 2 pints of fresh, rinsed and well drained blueberries. Spoon mixture into a buttered 9" square glass dish. ( I did not have a 9" square dish so I used a large glass pie plate).

Mix together until crumbly:

1 Cup of Sugar

2/3 Cups of Flour

1 Teaspoon of Cinnamon

1/2 Cup of Soft Butter

Top the batter with a Crumb Mixture.

Bake for 45 minutes. This Buckle is not only a show stopper,as it bakes it makes your house smell fantastic. If you are having guests over for brunch or just coffee, this is the dish you want to bake.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

By the way, more than a month later, I am still on my diet and am happy to report that despite a treat here or there, I have already shed 20 pounds. I am still cooking just about everyday. More on how I am eating differently coming up in a future post.

Until next time, is that the blueberries I hear calling?

Eating Humble Pie

According Mame Dennis (as played by Rosalind Russell in the original movie version of Auntie Mame),

"Life is a banquet and most sons of bitches are starving to death."

I could not agree with her more.

While I wasn’t lucky enough to have Mame Dennis for my Auntie Mame, I was blessed with having an Uncle Bob, or as he sometimes refers to himself, my Uncola. And for the record, the world would be a whole lot more fun if we all had an Uncola Bob like mine.

The Real Uncola, Bob Gregson in 2011

I adore my uncle for so many reasons, not the least being his never-ending passion for having fun.

My uncles Mark, Chris and Bob Gregson having fun with the new blocks I got for Christmas in 1964. That's me in the cool bow tie.

It was my uncle Bob who introduced me to the music I love, old movies, art and so much more.

A younger Bob with a few of his fun things

It was Bob who showed me how important it is to have fun just for the sake of having fun. My Uncle Bob has always been more than just a favorite relative of mine; he has been one of my closest friends.

My uncle and me in March of 2002

To say that I adore my uncle Bob is putting it mildly.

Ever since Bob was in college, he has been creating fantastic large-scale art events and celebrations.

Bob Gregson prepares for a Radiophonic event

Back in the spring of 1978, I was a high school sophomore trying to decide how to spend my summer break. I decided to ask my uncle Bob if he would allow me to could come spend the summer with him in Connecticut so that I could help him put on his summer events. I could think of no better way to spend my high school summer vacation than to spend it shadowing him and helping with his work.

But it was never to be.

One night while waiting to hear back from my uncle, my mother came into my bedroom with a letter that she asked me to read. It was from my Uncle Bob.

The letter, which was written to my mother, explained that although he would love to spend time with me, he felt it was not a good idea because he was gay. Many in my family considered Bob to be eccentric. Some in my family may have assumed that he was gay, but it had never been spelled out for us before. Suddenly I was forced to accept a reality that I really wasn' t ready for.

I read the passage in the letter over and over again. I felt crushed by the realization that if Bob was gay this meant he would never marry or have kids (a realization that greatly saddened me). I then began to wonder what this meant for me due to the fact that Bob and I were so much alike. Did this mean I could be gay too? Would people assume that I was gay because Bob was gay?

The next day I went to school, and though I felt I was okay, I really wasn’t. I was in my first class of the day when I became emotionally upset. I was so grief stricken in fact that I had to go to the nurse’s office. My mother was called to come take me home. I think I cried the rest of the day. It was that traumatic for me.

While I hadn't forgotten the event, I had forgotten just exactly how I processed the emotions until about a week ago when I cleaned out my steamer trunk and came across my high school journal.

There is a saying that goes: If we really want to cure cancer, we should ask a teenager while they still know everything. There is also a saying that goes: Just wait until you get older, then you will understand.

This is me back in 1979 when I still thought I knew everything.

Like most teenagers, I felt like I had a pretty good idea of what was right and what was wrong. As an adult, I can clearly see just how naïve that thinking was.

During my junior year of high school I took a speech class with Midlothian High School’s highly respected and beloved drama teacher Katherine Baugher. As part of her speech class, she would randomly instruct her students to take out their journals and begin writing about a topic.

One day I started writing about marriage. I wrote that I felt sorry for those people who, for one reason or another, would never marry. I then thought about my uncle Bob who I knew would never marry.

That got me writing about my reaction to the previous year’s news that Bob is gay. I wrote that I knew I would never be able to accept his lifestyle. While I love him and never blamed him for being gay or consider it a fault, it was never the less something I felt was a cause for great sadness. I remarked that while I knew I needed to become more open minded, I still felt pity for him.

To be fair, life in the late 1970s was much more difficult for a gay person than it is today.

Still, being the man I am today and reading those words I wrote as a teenager made me feel sick to my stomach all over again, but this time for a totally different reason. This time I was the gay man. To think that the younger me would not have been able to accept the me I am today saddened me. I was so ashamed of myself for once feeling that way. I knew at that moment just what it feels like to eat humble pie.

The recipe for Humble pie is easy. You simply apologize and face your humiliation. Reading those words was personally humiliating to me, even if they were the words of a young and naïve 16 year old me. Still, I feel compelled to apologize for my ignorance.

Thankfully I can forgive myself. As a parent I have seen my own kids learn and evolve in their thinking. Gratefully time allowed my thinking to evolve as well.

As it turned out, I was able to become more open minded. Bob waited for me to bring up the subject of his being gay. The next time Bob came for a visit, I took the opportunity to have a talk with him. I told him that I read the letter he sent Mom and that I knew he was gay. I also wanted him to know and that his being gay did not matter to me. I loved him for who he was, not who I had thought he was. That part of the story I am proud of.

Thankfully, our relationship has remained close.

Years later, Bob and his partner ( my Uncle Peter) attended my wedding to my former wife Hilary. When our son Jack was born, Bob was chosen to be his godfather. Many years later when I finally realized that I too was gay, Bob was one of the first people I was able to talk to about it.

In 2006, my partner Jim and I were fortunate enough to visit my uncles Bob and Peter when they celebrated their 30-year anniversary. As Jim and I sat among the other honored guests at their dinner party, I decided to make a toast to the happy couple.

This was my chance to thank them for all they had done for me. I raised my glass of champagne and said that I loved my uncles with all my heart. I wanted them to know that I was, and forever would be, eternally grateful to them because they had set such a fine example of what a loving couple could be.

Without them, I knew it would have been so much harder for my family to ever accept Jim and I as a loving, committed couple. Without people like Bob and Peter paving the way for other gay men and women, the gay community would never be able to live and love as openly as we do now.

So, do I still believe in the sanctity of marriage? Absolutely. I believe all people who are in loving, committed relationships; whether gay or heterosexual, deserve the right to be legally wed.

In fact, 7 years after Jim and I exchanged wedding rings in Paris, we intend to become legally wed in the United States on our wedding anniversary of September 19^th of this year.

In case you are wondering, Jim and I plan to celebrate our legal union with a slice of cake. I much prefer eating cake to eating humble pie any day.

Words to live by:

Be careful of the words you say.

And keep them soft and sweet.

For you never know from day to day.

Which ones you'll have to eat.